Hello Fear

There's a popular song circulating around my Christian circle of friends by Kirk Franklin called "Hello Fear." The title is of absolute appropriateness at this point in my life. I woke up with heartburn this morning at the thought of having to take a doctoral level math based course. Everyone's favorite in fact: statistics. So it is not only math based, but absolutely difficult for someone who cannot conceptualize numbers the way she does words. I'm out of my element here, and I am yes, you guessed it, afraid. If I could write a letter or a memo to my fear it would probably read something like:

Hello Fear,

Long time, no see. Actually I take that back, you've been hanging around for years, keeping me from succeeding when I needed to the most. You've tainted most of my experiences that are my deepest regrets.

Signed,

Me

I'm going to have to learn to not let my fear control me. I always keep moving forward, often not confronting things, but leaving them far behind me and taking my fear along with me. But it isn't always bad. Contained within these fears are all my hopes disguised. I'm afraid of failing statistics is really I hope that I do well. I'm afraid to lose this person is really, I hope you stay in my life. When looked at by its polar opposite, hope, fear cannot stand on its own. It's not the fears that drive you, but the hopes lurking behind every one. So don't despair, don't fear, don't worry. Hope. Say hello to your fear, face it head on. And then introduce it to your real friend, hope and keep moving, better, stronger, fearless.