I'm Learning to Eat Leftovers

This is my omelette with wheat toast! 

So...I'm that guy. That guy. The one who goes out to eat, orders way too much food, brings it home, and has no intention of eating it later. I don't care how good it is (or was). It's not happening. I am absolutely not going to eat it. Same as if I cook it as well. A pot of spaghetti that could feed a small village in Africa for a week will, in fact, sit in my refrigerator until it resembles a fourth grade science project. Countless casseroles have grown hair and forced me to call one of my brothers to come and dispose of it because I insist that it growled at me when I poked it with my handy cattle prod. And when I say "force" I'm not assigning human quality to an inanimate object, I mean I was forced by a living entity. If Dr. Frankenstein wanted his monster to live he should have just had me cook or order something and put it in my fridge. But I digress, I cooked dinner last night -- a pot of spaghetti, seasoned spinach and garlic bread. At the end of the night I looked into the pot and thought to myself "I'm not going to eat that spinach." But I was struck with an epiphany: "I can put that leftover spinach in an omelette for breakfast tomorrow morning." I swear if it wasn't for Chopped I wouldn't challenge myself to be culinarily creative. And that's just what I did this morning, I made an omelette out of the leftover spinach and devoured it all. I sprinkled a little grated parmesan cheese on top and made some wheat toast and had a nice breakfast. It was cool. Not that I used the leftover spinach to make something good, but that I used the leftover spinach and made something good. All these years I thought that if it wasn't fresh that it couldn't be used. And today I learned that sometimes it's better if it isn't fresh. Some things need to be revisited in order for us to grow and learn from them and move on. Whether it's pain, joy, laughter, tears....or leftover spinach from the night before.

People-please no more!

Whatever you do in life has to be good enough for you. If you do what you do for others, then you'll never be happy with the result because it was done with the motive of pleasing others. I remembered this today when I decided to do something I've been too afraid to do. I was worried that no one would appreciate it or that I needed to change in order to appeal more. All I have to say is: no more. Whatever you do in life has to be good enough for you. I cannot stress this enough. I mean, I can, but I don't need to. So I won't.

Team Dreamer

Around the track. Ok, only two ahead of me. And...passing one...and...now...two. Ok picking up speed. Running faster...faster...just one more lap. Wow, am I really that far ahead of everyone else? My goodness, I must really be killing it. Ok, no, focus...focus. There's the finish line! Spread your arms, throw your head back in victory...and you've won! You've just won the gold medal! 
No, I didn't steal this stream of consciousness from some novel or the pages of an Olympic athlete's autobiography. These came from my own mind. It's what was going through my mind last night as I dreamed that there was a race I was running -- no, that I was winning by a large margin. Have you ever dreamed you were in a race? How did you feel going into it? Were you tired? Were you exhilarated? Were you winning, were you losing? Did you want to quit? A few weeks ago I dreamed I was in a marathon and I wasn't exhausted or anything. I had already run half of it and was ready for the other half. I was encouraged. I was excited. I woke up. I turned over and went back to sleep. Fast forward to today. I dreamed that I was going for it -- and killing it. I've never run track a day in my life, but here I was at the Olympics, earning a gold medal. I believe in the significance of my dreams and that bit of encouragement was not sent to tell me "ok, lay back, you're beating everybody by a wide margin." Races are not so easily won, although it seems that way. And in dreamland, let's face it, your mind is doing all the work. I believe I had that dream to encourage me to roll up my sleeves and hit the ground running. I have everything I need to finish the race and finish it strong. I get tired in real life because I'm out of shape, out of practice. But I'll get there. In my dream it was important to know that I was winning the race, but what I relish most about the reality, is that I'm even still running. And whether I come in first or come in last, I finish.

Bucket Lists

I've heard thousands of things about them, hundreds of people have mentioned them, and dozens of people have already started completing them. That's right, you guessed it (especially after reading the title of this particular blog post) I'm talking about Bucket Lists. They seemed like they were so pointless to me for the longest time. I had a mental checklist of things that I wanted to accomplish before I kissed this here world goodbye, except I didn't look at it in that way. I had a list of things I was planning to do. Then it dawned on me today at a restaurant that there was something I wanted to do but did not have the means or the time to accomplish just now. And isn't that the point of a bucket list? To remember that you'd told yourself some things that you wanted to accomplish before you kicked the bucket? The absolute first thing I'm putting on my bucket list is: feed baby elephants in India. The second is own a farm or at least live on one. So, my faithful reader(s), whatever it is you want to accomplish, even if you can't do it now, dream it now and write it down. Just be sure to periodically add to it, or even remember that you have it written down.

How could you not want to be close to a baby elephant? 

What I've Learned...

This is me pensive. I know, right? Ravishing isn't it?

To date, I've had a great many things imparted to me over the years, but over the past few weeks life has handed me some real lessons:

1) It's best to go to the post office on Thursday. Afternoon. I promise you I walked in there last week to mail a letter and not a soul was in line. Fastest, most courteous service. Ever.

2) Spend time cultivating life's greatest pleasures. Amelie Poulain enjoyed breaking the crispy layer of her Creme Brulee before eating it, and dipping her hand into sacks of grain. I like bookstores and Target. Also slightly burnt toast and vegetarian bacon. Mostly, I like spending time either eating my favorite things or going to my favorite places.

3) Watch an old movie every once in awhile. If not for any other reason, to enjoy great costume designs, fabulous dialogue and timeless love stories. You'll be wishing you were in Bette Davis' fantastic shoes from Now, Voyager in no time.

4) Do what you love. What keeps you up at night? What moves you? Do it.

5) Never let anyone tell you how it's going to be. You're worth more than the box that others will try to put you in.

Changing my opinion of change...

So I said that change is good, a few blog posts ago, but I changed my mind. Sometimes change is not so good. Finally after two years, Opry Mills reopened and I was disappointed...to say the least. The flood came through, destroyed the mall and it took a long time for it to be rebuilt, but I never considered that it would be reborn. When I walked in the door today, I saw some new stores and didn't see some of the old ones I was looking forward to seeing. It's new now and it's different and I'm not so sure how much I like it, but there's nothing I can do about it now. Or before. Or at all really. I can only remember the past as it was, adjust to the new changes in the present, and anticipate with all certainty that there will be new ones in the future. Actually, I don't want to change my opinion of change. I'm grateful for it. Life would be so boring if it didn't exist.

Create Post

When I logged into write a blog post today (hi it's me again, yes I said the last post was in fact my last post, but it's the internet not tablets of stone.), I saw the heading at the top of the page said "Create Post." Create. I like that word, and while I don't necessarily like the word "post," it's come to symbolize something vastly different as the saying of yore (you know, "dumb as a post"). It has come to symbolize a message placed in cyberspace for so many people to read, weigh in on, or not, but either way for people to read. I started out writing with this irrational fear of failure and the real fear has been not even trying. I did in fact say that I felt the winds of change blowing in and that I was no longer going to be using this blog, but I still need to create ways for people to find likely joys in unlikely places. I still need to share my experiences as a human being so that people can read what's written here and think "yeah, that was my experience too. I'm not alone." I need to hear what others think about what 's written here and weigh in on it too. I'm not the only one with joys or sorrows to share. That and, I really missed connecting with day to day life. I started my other blog (by the way it's www.musiccitydreaming.blogspot.com) to chronicle my desire to break into screenwriting -- the ups, the downs, the yesses, the no's (oh so many no's, but that's the business) the dreams and the reality. I didn't think I needed to continue talking about how to brighten your corner of the world or take some time brightening someone else's.

What I want to contribute now to the world, is my words. They've been true to me, as true to me as I have been to them, but they've remained hidden from the world and that is no way to share. So I will continue to create posts, here and also on my other blog -- The Journey of a Thousand Miles -- as long as I can (or until I get tired of maintaining two blogs). But I'm not sure I'll get tired of it, I love to write and even though I may not be publishing, I am always creating. I'd might as well be making some posts while I'm at it.